The Gift of Giving – a Good Deeds Post

Tags

advent, creativity, flow, freedom, generosity, gifts, giving, good deeds, gratitude, life, love, receiving

“Presents are made for the pleasure of who gives them, not the merits of who receives them.”
― Carlos Ruiz Zafón, The Shadow of the Wind

Giving is the reflection of receiving, for one can’t exist without the other, and there is a playful universal dance that grows ever more expressive and ecstatic when we feed into that magic law with generous abandon.

I came across this article recently…

http://positivenews.org.uk/2014/blogs/16714/day-christmas-neighbour-gave-me/

…and I recognised in it ripples from an article in this magazine…

http://www.flowmagazine.com/

…about this book…

…and then I began to join the dots:-)

So yesterday found me spontaneously doing a major sort out, and I began to fill a designated Box of Delights (had to call it that because there was a  book and a TV series of the same name which I loved as a child…anyone else remember that?) with potential gifts, items I no longer needed but that would bring joy to another. So I have committed myself to giving one thing away a day for advent. Quite how this will evolve I’m not sure, but instead of recounting good deeds, for the next four Sunday posts I will detail what I gave away during the week.

Freedom is a huge word which has always had a powerful resonance with me, and I have gone through several different versions of it in my life, being lucky enough to have been gifted a lot of it in various ways. I’ve acquired along the way several different tools that bring me closer to Freedom in its purest form, and I believe giving is one of the most powerful amongst my assembled kit. May I wield it consciously, playfully and with love.

Good Deeds Received

A much beloved friend sent me a very beautiful long email which touched me deeply, and also a text asking for my current address (I must’ve made a real mess of her address book, as I seem to keep moving!). I wonder what she needs that for…?:-)

My mother unexpectedly turned up to pick me up from work as she’d finished early in the cafe. That saved me a walk to the bus station, not to mention a boring wait and a late arrival home. What a treat!

My sister sent me a wonderful letter, which included gorgeous photos, summing up the highlights of her year with her family (she is married with three children) along with a mini sweet filled advent calendar which she’d gift wrapped and presented with so much love and care, not to mention creative flair.

My new polish friend and now student was soooo excited by the book I lent her last Friday (a Paulo Coelho book called Like the Flowing River, which is a collection of mini stories and inspirational reflections) she couldn’t stop thanking me, and then on Monday she thanked me again and said she thought it was going to be her favourite book ever:-)

Another factory friend gave me her contact details and asked that we keep in touch when she left on Friday, as she had decided to finish her contract early.

A friend and her boyfriend, who’d been away for a couple of weeks, turned up spontaneously at the cafe last night and helped Mum and I clean up after a busy day – what a gift!

I opened my inbox this morning to a lovely email from a friend asking that we have a walk and catch up together soon, as I seemed to have disappeared or been  ‘gobbled up by the factory and turned into a biscuit…I miss you.’:-)

Good Deeds Done

Sent one of the homemade Christmas cards I’ve been making to my sister in Germany, and included a letter to thank her for the advent calendar and photos etc.

Went to Mum’s cafe earlier than planned because she ended up being really busy.

Caught up with a couple of people who’d donated things to an auction I’d held to raise money for my Rwandan friend Beatha. The things they’d offered hadn’t been sold, so I wanted to return them or find other homes for them if the gifters didn’t want them back.

Picked up some glitter and glue Mum needed for her current up-cycling creative projects. I promise to share a photo of the Christmas Tree made from an old yellow pages (!!!) soon:-) It’s GORGEOUS!

Tried out the soup recipe a friend had shared and made lunch for Mum and I. Mum’s response, ‘Sensational!’ So…make a basic leek and potato soup, then, once the potatoes are completely cooked, add a bag of fresh spinach, a tin of coconut milk and a dash of curry powder. Wizz it together and what have you got? Utter deliciousness, hot in a pot!!!

Took a moment to fill out a feedback form I found on the table in a cafe I went to, thanking them for their wonderful service.

Dug out the beautiful pre-loved advent calendar I’d been gifted by a friend and her son when they returned to Germany earlier in the year, and set it out ready for opening tomorrow! They’d been using the same one for years, as they loved it so much, so I will certainly be thinking of them as I enjoy it myself for the first time.

Have a wonderful week dear friends:-)

Love always, Harula xxx

Community…a Good Deeds post

Tags

change, community, creativity, good deeds, gratitude, nature, poem, tribe

I recently re-discovered this poem which I wrote during a creative writing session I was holding, in response to the prompt ‘Community – the blessing and/or curse’. Community, tribe, belonging, family – these words are weaving a web around me at the moment which is both a comfort and, at times, stifling. I notice the joys and the challenges of the world being at my finger tips the moment I touch my keyboard, and the number of varying relationships that creates, and the conflict that can arise in me when I have to make choices about how, where and with whom I communicate.

Technology has changed the options available to us for how and where we create our sense of ‘community’ and this has huge benefits, and I also notice I need to balance that with; chats with my neighbour who lives next to me, walks in the nearby woods amongst the trees who bless the air I breathe, so that I stay ‘in community’ with the life around me right now.

 

As I walk around

I hear my name

called out by familiar voices

for reasons as varied

as the speakers themselves

***

Some are simple questions

answered with a single sentence

others invite me to linger

and take a hand in mine

as time dances around

a conversation that deepens

to transcend any linear frame

***

My name lives here

in the heads and hearts

of those around me

as well as in the books and files

that log my existence

and yet…

***

I hear a silent call

as community for me

stretches and expands

to include those

who don’t yet know my name

but touch me from afar

with the ripples

of their joys and sorrows

calling me into the next

best expression

of what it means

to belong…

 

 

Good Deeds Received

A lovely Polish woman I met at the factory treated me to tea in a cafe, where we had our first English ‘lesson’.

I received a very loving and unexpected package of chocolate, tea and a postcard from a friend I hadn’t heard from in a while.

Mum gave me loads of very enthusiastic feedback on the Christmas cards I’ve been making.

Nature continues to bless and impress with the incredible colours of the changing season.

Really enjoyed the comments I’ve received on recent posts – thank you all:-)

The guinea fowl I occasionally help to look after gave me such a fun and heart warming early start to my day on Saturday, when I went to feed them and let them out. They didn’t seem to want to get up either – it was so funny, bless them. I was there for over half an hour trying to encourage them out and get them to fly over the fence to continue their exploration of the wider world. It only takes one…and then the others surely follow:-)

A friend of Mum’s came to the cafe and shared what sounds like a great  (and very simple) soup recipe with me. I’ll share it once it’s tried and tested:-) It’s definitely soup season!

Good Deeds Done

Dropped a letter round to a friend’s house, as it had mistakenly been delivered to me.

Helped a friend clean and prepare her house for welcoming her son and daughter in law.

Made some more Christmas cards that I hope will bring as much joy to whoever eventually receives them (haven’t made my list yet!?!) as they gave me making them. I love getting crafty!

Sent this month’s money to Beatha in Rwanda, and had a chat with her two young sons on the phone. Haven’t spoken to them for ages – so sweet, even if we don’t have much of a shared language, we can still laugh together and blow kisses down the line…

Immediately sent an email to the friend who’d sent me the surprise package, thanking her and promising her some snail mail in return:-)

Picked up some litter during a walk in the woods.

Baked some flapjacks instead of eating shop bought biscuits…because it’s fun, and also I now know more about how wasteful the commercial process can be. Problem is, food is often even more deliciously more-ish when you make it yourself, so you probably end up eating more so is it really saving on wasted energy/packaging etc etc….agghhh! Why can’t life be more simple:-)

Have a great week my friends, cultivating and nourishing community in whatever form that takes for you:-)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Imagination…a Good Deeds post

Tags

beauty, creativity, good deeds, gratitude, imagination, nature, poem, poetry

I t will take you everywhere.

M ust be true

A fter all, Einstein said it

G enius that he was.

I n all seriousness though

N o theft is greater

A nd more future harming

T han mining it from the depths of our children

I n the pursuit of malleable mediocrity

O r don’t you believe

N ew levels of thinking are what’s called for?

You all know I love a good acrostic:-) It occurred to me this morning that imagination is a muscle, albeit an emotionally fuelled one, and as much in need of regular testing and flexing as any other, if it’s not to atrophy. As I was compiling a shopping list this morning my mind got busy comparing the due merits of doing what needs to be done versus doing what’s fun, and I decided those two things didn’t necessarily need to be so utterly separated. I began to compile an alternative shopping list, just in case I were ever to find that elusive one stop shop that sells everything…and I mean everything and anything. There were ten things on my normal shopping list, so I wrote ten alternatives too, the first that came into my head, which looked like this:

An everlasting water bottle that instantly and automatically refills (Ok, a bit boring and practical, I was just getting warmed up, but damn useful, you must admit)

A pocket sized foldable instant camp fire (Ok, still kind of practical, but a cool party trick…)

A flying unicorn (well, that was kind of inevitable wasn’t it, there had to be a cliche in there somewhere…)

A notepad that reads all your thoughts and automatically writes them down (ok, obviously this could be dangerous and needs an off switch, but very useful too for those of us whose minds are much faster than our hands can write, and what’s a life without risk?)

A talking dog (ok, I know you all think your dogs already talk to you but don’t pretend you don’t know what I mean, like REALLY talks…)

A fruit and nut tree (I’m imagining cherries, pears, apples, hazelnuts and grapes all on the same tree…)

A harp (have you every played one? I have a little…magic!)

A wood burning aga (but maybe I need to buy the cottage it goes in first…)

A word swallower – it eats the words you wish you’d never said and then erases them from the collective memory!

A pair of trousers that automatically resize and adapt themselves to the changing shape of my body!

So that’s me touching in with my currently rather neglected imagination and, though I can feel a bit of an inner ache, it stood up quite well to the exercise. Now I need to make it more often and regular, and see what it can really do. The dark, cold, indoorsiness of winter’s a great time for some serious imagination training:-) Hey, come spring I’ll be running (imaginary!) marathons:-)

Good Deeds Received

Had a lovely chat with a Polish woman who was working with me on the packing line at the factory, during which time we discovered a mutual love of poetry and she asked for my number so I could give her and her family some English lessons!

A friend invited me over for dinner and Saturday night TV:-)

My Dad sent me some fun photos during his journey back to Bali.

Had an incredible conversation with a friend which was getting deeper and more delicious by the second and then…I had to go to work! We pressed the pause button, and will no doubt pick up where we left off next time we meet.

Received a lovely text message from a friend who hadn’t seen me for a while and wanted to know how I was doing.

A friend emailed to ask if I still needed a contribution towards the fundraising I was doing for Beatha in Rwanda, and I managed to stop myself from replying no, it’s ok, I reached my target (she has already helped so much…) and instead shared that actually, yes, her help was most welcome. I realised from her joyful and generous response that it really sometimes is a gift to the giver to welcome their gift.

A friend and colleague invited me to hold a creative writing session with her group, shortly before Christmas and requested I infuse it with festive spirit! I’m looking forward to that:-)

Good Deeds Done

I helped out in Mum’s cafe when she heard at late notice that one of her colleagues couldn’t make it.

I called my friend Beatha in Rwanda immediately when I saw she’d ‘beeped’ me (i.e. left me a missed call so I could see she needed to talk). I will send the next monthly installment a little earlier than planned, as she’s been prescribed some new medication and didn’t have money left from last month.

I called my Dad as he was on his way to the airport to wish him a good journey back to Bali.

A good deed to my body – I made a commitment to myself to prepare and take with me healthy food for my tea breaks at the factory, as I’ve been eating far too many biscuits!!!!

Created and printed off some menus for Mum’s cafe so people can pre-order their pizzas over the phone.

Picked up some litter on my way to work.

Helped out a colleague who was getting a bit behind speed because the biscuits he was putting into the plastic containers being they were boxed hadn’t been stacked properly by the people who’d taken them from the oven.

Have a great week my friends and may that wild Imagination of yours take you places you’ve never even dreamed of…and then write me a ‘postcard’ in the comments below:-)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Playlist Finale – 2004/2014

Tags

dancing, family, father, good deeds, music

A decade full of divas to bring some harmony and happiness to your Monday, and make you feel like ‘a room without a roof’ (what DOES that lyric mean?!) Here endeth the melodious journey from 1944 to 2014. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Have a great week friends.

Blessings,

Harula xxxxxx

2004 The Closest Thing To Crazy – Katie Melua

2005 Because of You – Kelly Clarkson

2006 You’re beautiful – James Blunt

2007 Mr Rock and Roll – Amy Macdonald

2008 Bleeding Love – Leona Lewis

2009 Halo – Beyonce

2010 Just the way you are – Bruno Mars

2011 Price Tag – Jessie J

2012 Someone Like You – Adele

2013 Happy – Pharrell Williams

2014 Superheros – The Script

Playlist part 5 – 1984/1993

Tags

dancing, family, father, good deeds, music

I found this ten year period quite tricky, there was a lot of commercial rubbish around, but I think I still found some gems:-) Enjoy!

1984 What’s love got to do with it – Tina Turner

1985 Walking on sunshine – Katrina and the waves

1986 Diamonds on the soles of her shoes – Paul Simon

1987 Living on a Prayer – Bon Jovi

1988 Fast Car – Tracey Chapman

1989 Smooth Criminal – Michael Jackson

1990 A little time – Beautiful South

1991 More than words – Extreme

1992 Under the Bridge – Red Hot Chilli Peppers

1993 Dreams – Gabrielle

 

 

Playlist part 4 – 1974/1983

Tags

dancing, family, father, good deeds, music

So here’s part four, which includes the year I was born! Lot’s of drama in these ten years. Was it the music of this time that turned me into a drama queen? Enjoy!
1974 Bennie and the Jets – Elton John

1975 Kung Fu Fighting – Carl Douglas

1976 What a Night – Four Seasons

1977 Dancing Queen – ABBA

1978 I can’t smile without you – Barry Manilow

1979 Bright Eyes – Art Garfunkel

1980 Call me – Blondie

1981 Endless Love – Lionel Ritchie and Diana Ross

1982 Don’t pay the ferryman – Chris de Burgh

1983 Karma Chameleon – Culture Club

Playlist part 3 – 1964/1973

Tags

dancing, family, father, good deeds, music

The next 10 years in the playlist I prepared for my Dad. and it’s time to let the music touch you, speak to you of the world and its woes, and then be that change. The world was opening up…let your heart do the same.

Year Song
1964 The Times are a-Changin’ – Bob Dylan

1965 Ticket To Ride – The Beatles

1966 Can’t Hurry Love – Supremes

1967 Sitting on the Dock of the Bay – Otis Redding

1968 Born to be wild – Steppenwolf

1969 Aquarius – Fifth Dimension

1970 Big Yellow Taxi – Joni MItchell

1971 Moonshadow – Cat Stevens

1972 The Lion Sleeps Tonight – Robert John

1973 You’re my home – Billy Joel

Playlist part 2 – 1954/1963

Tags

dancing, family, father, good deeds, music

Here’s the next 10 years in the playlist I prepared for my Dad. I dare you, I just DARE you, to try to listen to these tunes without moving and grooving and humming and shaking. Ladies and gentlemen, we’re entering the swinging 60s…ENJOY:-)
1954 Young at Heart – Frank Sinatra

1955 Rock around the Clock – Bill Hayley and his Comets

1956 Whatever will be will be (Que Sera Sera) – Doris Day

1957 Bye Bye Love – Everly Brothers

1958 Do you wanna dance – Bobby Freeman

1959 Shout – Isley Brothers

1960 The Twist – Chubby Checker

1961 Will you love me tomorrow – Shirelles

1962 Can’t help falling in Love – Elvis Presley

1963 Ring of Fire – Johnny Cash

Music – A Good Deeds Post

Tags

birthday, family, fathers, gifts, good deeds, gratitude, love, music, presents

Today is my Dad’s birthday. I’m not going to get overly sentimental here, but my father is a very remarkable man who has not only been a solid supportive rock throughout my life, but who also has a softness I haven’t met in many men – and this combination is utterly beautiful. He also has a love of music which, when I’m in his company, fiercely infects me. So, for the man who has everything, what do I give him for a milestone birthday?

I got inspired at the weekend and spent most of Saturday evening and nearly all of Sunday creating an alternative present – a song list of seventy songs, one for every year of his life. For him I’ve included comments on why I chose each song and what they mean to me, but I’ll keep that personal. Here I just want to share the list, beginning with the first ten years from 1944 – 1953. I have had so much fun meeting or revisiting these old classics – enjoy! And if you have an alternative recommendation for any of these years, do share in the comments…
1944 Swinging on a star – Bing Crosby

1945 Accentuate the positive – Johnny Mercer and the Pied Pipers

1946 Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow – Vaughn Monroe

1947 La Vie en Rose – Edith Piaf

1948 Nature Boy – Nat King Cole

1949 Some Enchanted Evening – Perry Como

1950 Goodnight Irene – Gordon Jenkins and the Weavers

1951 Mockin’ Bird Hill – Patti Page

1952 Jambalaya on the Bayou – Hank Williams

1953 PS I love you – The Hilltoppers

Good Deeds Received

A kindly welcome from my colleagues at the factory, and lots of support while I tried to get up so speed packing biscuit boxes on a fast conveyor belt!

I have been offered a try out at the retreat centre I mentioned last week! I will go for a week in January and then, if they accept me, I will start the job in their kitchen for real in February. I’m very excited!

Several people have been very kind in affirming my decision to take a job at Gaia House, saying it feels right – but they’ll miss me…

Mum cooked a delicious meal for me on my first night back in her house, and let me use her car to go to and from work as she didn’t need it.

Got a lovely postcard from my niece, who is in America with her Dad at the moment.

Got a lovely text from the friend whose house I stayed in, thanking me for the care I’d taken of the house and the cat.

Had a really magical, inspiring conversation with the friend who reared the guinea fowl I’ve been helping to look after.

Good Deeds Done

Gave an English lesson to the husband of a friend of mine who wants to leave the factory and work as an electrician, which he is qualified to do in his own country – but he needs to improve his language to do that work here.

Created a song list for my Dad – hope it’s as much fun for him, as it was for me compiling it…

Got a life back from the factory from my friend and her husband during my first week of work. So nice to be able to share my first week of experiences with them.

Went pine cone collecting for my friend, before she returns, to replace those I’d used to start the fire while living at her place.

Went food shopping for my Mum, before returning to stay at her place again for a while.

Fed my friend’s guinea fowl while she was away.

Helped out in Mum’s cafe when the woman who usually helps her clean up at the end of the weekend wasn’t able to come.

Listening…A Good Deeds Post

Tags

biscuits, good deeds, gratitude, job, life, listening, service, trust, work

It’s interesting how quickly life can turn the tides on you, and I notice the good stuff seems to gather around me when I’m willing to genuinely listen. I shared last week how I’d been turned down for a care job I’d applied for. So, I got that letter on the Saturday and by Tuesday afternoon…I had a job! How? Because I started listening…

Last Monday night I was alone in the living room after Mum had gone to bed with nothing I particularly wanted or needed to do. ‘Do it!’ I heard, and I listened. Now this thing I was being told to ‘do’ was something I’d wanted to do for a while, and I’d talked myself out of it a hundred times with a thousand excuses, and I fully expected those to resurface. They didn’t. There was inner silence, and my fingers skipped lightly and happily over the keyboard as if they had a life of their own and no effort was required from me. They were writing an inquiry email about a job at the retreat centre I’ve been to twice this year, the deadline for which had, with my complete knowledge and acceptance, already been and gone. What my fingers were writing was a question – would it still be OK if I submitted an application, and completed with, ‘For the well being of all at Gaia House I sincerely hope the perfect person has already come along to take on the role. However, if for any reason you are still looking and a later start date would be possible then I look forward to hearing from you.’

The next morning brought an answer. They’d love to receive an application from me! OK, this was getting a bit real. And there was another issue. This job was very much about service, with a small monthly allowance and room and board in return for my full-time work in their kitchen. So now I needed money. ‘Just do it!’, so I did. ‘Could you come for an interview this afternoon?’ And so it was that in less than twenty four hours I’d opened up the possibility of a job I’ve dreamed of for months AND secured a temporary job in a biscuit factory (!) to earn the money I need to make the dream job viable!!! Super cool!!!

Do you know that feeling? That feeling when the loving Universe says, ‘Ah hah, well done, you’re listening again at last so sure – now I can help you. Ok, what do you need?’ There’s a sense of inevitability and flow. And you know what – it doesn’t even really matter what happens next. Rediscovering that sense of following through on intuition, gut feeling, calling, whatever name you want to give it, is such a gift the result is almost irrelevant. There’s a letting go that accepts that life holds no guarantees and living from trust means I don’t ask for or expect them, but if I’m willing to listen, I can be more responsive to whatever comes. That feels very alive.

Good Deeds Received

A dear friend whom I hadn’t caught up with in a while responded to my invite for a cuppa and we had an amazing conversation, during which we delved into multiple layers of life and she mentioned a book she wanted to lend me. That evening, I found the book on my doorstep. The last book she recommended was life changing, so I’m a little nervous – but also very excited to start this one…

The lady who interviewed me gave me a job at the biscuit factory on the spot, and invited me in for an induction the next day!

The following day my induction included a tour of the factory (which has just a hint of Willy Wonka…) and one of the other women on the induction, whom I’d just that morning met, smilingly helped me to tuck my hair fully into the obligatory hairnet, as it’s hard to see round the back.

A friend whose husband works at the factory very kindly agreed to give me a lift home when she picks him up, as there is no late bus back to where I live, and I’m on an afternoon/evening shift like him.

My Mum was more than understanding and supportive when I told her I might be moving to Gaia House, and assured me I must do whatever will make me happy.

The woman in charge of the applications at Gaia House emailed me within a hour of my having sent the completed application, thanking me and saying they’d get back to me as soon as possible. So, friends, please keep everything crossed for me.

The friend whose house and cat I’m looking after while she’s away left a fire ready to light, all laid out ready in the wood stove – how sweet!

Good Deeds Done

Texted a friend who’s just released her small flock of Guinea fowl into the area where I’m living in my other friend’s house, to say I’d just seen the Guineas and counted only five (there should be six!) She immediately went looking and number six (Sam his name is) can’t be found. I hope he’s ok and, if he’s not, I hope the others are now a little wiser!

I hung up some fresh laundry and folded the dry stuff when I dropped in on my Mum’s house to pick up some stuff.

Have been spending regular quality time with the cat here, who’s called Cinders, and hanging out with her on the sofa. I love the warm sound and gentle shake of a purring cat!

Organised for someone else to drop in on Cinders in the early evening when I’ll be at work during the week, to give her her ‘supper’ and keep her company for a bit.

Created a mini shell sculpture on the beach to thank the sea and entertain passers by, until the next tide gobbles it up.

Turned up with a cake to a birthday party with a difference – it was to honour the lady I used to care for who passed away earlier this year, and whose birthday it would have been, had she still been alive. It was a sweet gathering, as many of us hadn’t seen each other for a while, and it was lovely for her husband to have his home filled with cake, chatter and  company again. The party had been his idea.

The cake I’d intended for the party wasn’t needed there, so I took it to Mum’s cafe and we ate it there, sharing it with several lucky customers over a cup of tea.

I believe there’s truly magic in listening –  let me know your own experiences/thoughts in the comments below, and have a great week my friends!